Spring 2019

HOMESCHOOLIOWA.ORG

am blessed to know several well-balanced teens and young

adults who act and think beyond their years in a way that is not

common in our culture. As I observe them, I wonder what makes

them different. I would like to share my observations with you.

I do not want to put the burden of perfection on these young peo-

ple. Like all of us, they have flaws. They have moments of goofing off

and being loud (which isn’t necessarily immaturity, depending on the

time, place, and who they are with at the moment). They have times

when they get on each other’s nerves. But, overall, they are kind,

friendly, hardworking young people who reach out to people of all

ages.

First appearances can be deceiving. Some young people may ap-

pear to be more adult-like, but upon closer observation, it becomes

apparent that there is a pride problem and that they want to project

themselves as very grown up, but it is really all about them. Other

young adults may appear to be immature at first, but upon further

observation, you realize that, while they may have moments of child-

ishness or a strong sense of humor, they are mature at heart.

I realize that most of you reading this probably have young chil-

dren. This list is something you can strive toward with your children.

Please do not become discouraged. Just keep on keeping on. Matu-

rity takes time, both in us and in our children. None of us will fully

arrive until we reach Heaven.

Here is the list of character qualities that I see in teens/young adults

that aremature, as well as examples of howparents of young children

can work toward these goals.

1) They know how to talk to people of any age.

They are com-

fortable talking with a two-year-old, someone who is elderly, and

every age in between. A way to help younger children achieve this

is to encourage them to reach out to all ages. Have them play with

a toddler. Instruct them to draw a picture for an elderly person at

church. Role play at home to help them learn how they can respond

and what they can say when someone in a different age group talks

to them. Surround them with families who have children of all ages.

Point out someone older than them who has reached out to them

and had an impact on their life. Explain to them how they can have

this kind of impact on someone younger than them. Most of all, talk

to them about how precious everyone is in God’s eyes. Since people

of all ages are precious to God, they should be precious to us.

2) They usually have a strong family unit.

Their parents’marriages

are strong. The siblings are good friends. The obvious answer as to

how to instill this in your younger children is to have a strong mar-

riage and to teach your children that they are best friends. Having

said that, I’d like to make a huge disclaimer. I know wonderful young

adults who have grown up in a very dysfunctional home. I know sin-

gle moms (and one single dad) who are doing a fantastic job raising

their children. If your marriage is not as you’d like it to be, or you are a

teen/young adult who is in a tough home situation, please know that

God gives grace and that your home life does not have to define your

future. There is a huge advantage to kids who are raised in a home

Raising Our Children

to Be Mature

BY KIM STILWELL